An Essay on Writing

How I reconciled my English major with my ambitions to become a physician, and how I hope to live a life of service through storytelling

When I first fell in love with writing as a homeschooled high school student, it was mostly an emotional process. I had turned to writing as a way to cope with having a narcissistic mother. I didn’t write often, but it kept me sane. I was able to channel my deepest feelings on paper, and what I wrote was an extension of myself. So, I didn’t have to think too deeply about anything that I wrote. When I decided to change my major from Sustainable Food and Farming to English in my second semester of college, I really didn't know what I was doing. I was a premed student whose only plan was to become a doctor, so I hadn’t put much thought into what I would major in. I had heard that English was the best major for pre-med students, so I decided to try it. Up until that point, I had read a lot and had done some writing, but not much.

My idea of writing changed when I switched my major to English, however. I had to write about novels or topics that I found uninteresting, and began to see that good writing takes so much more than emotion — it takes work. This new experience with writing also caused me to question what writing meant to me, and the importance of my major. After all, I was a premed student. Was I even going to use my skills as a writer and reader after medical school? Writing about novels often felt meaningless, even though my writing skills were improving. I felt that I was wasting my time, but it was too late to change my major again.

However, one class by Professor David Fleming changed my outlook on writing. It focused on the writing of personal essays and creative nonfiction writing. This class opened my eyes to the possibilities that existed for me as a writer, outside of writing novels. For the first time in my life, I had an opportunity to tell my story and hear my classmates' stories. This experience of writing and reading real-life stories ignited my passion for storytelling and gave me new insights into how I could utilize my knowledge of writing outside of college.

As a high school student, I had read stories by doctors, journalists and humanitarian aid workers around the world, who chronicled their lives and efforts to serve disadvantaged and underserved people. Their words inspired me to pursue a life of service in medicine and to make a positive change in the world. One such book was “Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide,” an excellent read by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn that I highly recommend. But the story that changed my life was the story of Dr. Halima Bashir. In her memoir, “Tears of the Desert: A Memoir of Survival in Darfur,” she recounts her fascinating story, from becoming the first doctor in her village at the age of 24, to seeing her entire village targeted and destroyed by a terrorist group called the Janjaweed. She was one of the only people in her family to live and escape to England. While Bashir’s memoir is a painful, heartbreaking read, it is hopeful. When I read her memoir in high school, the comforts of my middle-class life in America prohibited me from being able to comprehend her loss and suffering. But I was able to imagine her pain, and I realized that I had to do more in life than pursue happiness and comfort. I decided then that as a future physician, I wanted to go to the places nobody deemed safe to travel to, and serve as many ill, suffering and displaced people as possible. After taking Professor Fleming’s class, I realized that someday I could make a difference by sharing the stories of those who are affected by humanitarian and health care crises around the world (with their permission and while protecting their identity) and inspire others to live a life of service.

Since graduating from college in May, I continue to ask myself, “Why do I write?” All humanities and arts majors must ask themselves a version of this question at some point: “Why do I do what I do? What am I getting from it, and what am I giving to the world?” I write because writing helps me to make sense of my own life and of the world around me. By incorporating writing into my life as a future physician, I will be able to bring awareness to the stories and suffering of others. Reading about the plights of individual people, as opposed to reading a news article about a crisis, invites us to join in the suffering of whomever we are reading about. Their humanity becomes real to us through their story, thus leaving us with an option. We can act as though we never were made aware of their suffering, or we can choose to do something about what we now know.

When I become a doctor, I hope to encourage others to make a difference in the world, just as Dr. Bashir inspired me with her story. My desire is to catalyze change by creating awareness of global issues and providing readers with ways to help. To be honest, I don’t know if there’s a name for this kind of writing, or where I would publish my writing - the stories I would share may just end up on a blog. But if one person reads those stories and decides that they want to help make a difference, it will be worthwhile.